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 Apology and happinings

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Cuervo25_1

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Age : 43
Location : North New Jersey
Registration date : 2011-01-13

PostSubject: Apology and happinings   Fri Nov 16, 2012 2:27 pm

First of all I would like to apologize for going AWOL on the bombers, I owe Blackhorse and my co- bombers an explaination.

Many of you know about my son being molested and the stress it has caused uss,it has became much more dire as at 9 years old he has been suicidal. With many hours of therapy and some huge breakthroughs he is now getting past that. I suspect spending more time with me has helped due to both jobs finally slowing down to where I can be home more, but more on that later.


With all that has happened over the past few months I don't recall if I ever mentioned my wife's health. She always has asthma( I don't smoke in the house because of this), allergies, and sleep apnia . but now it has turned to COPD still has allergies, and sleep apnia but she also developed muscle dystonia. We finally go news that she is getting the breathing apparatus that forces her to breath while sleeping so hopefully that will take care of that part. She is also trying to get disability since she can no longer work. She lawyered up and they completed everything and we are now waiting on the state. The lawyer has a very high success rate and said my wife has an excellant case.


which now brings it to me for the past few months I been putting in at least 80 hr work weeks, with Sandy hitting it has been more due to the huge lines at the gas station and the manager needing as many people as possible to run the pumps, give breaks, ect. Through all this and me forcing the manager and her husband to go home and rest and letting them know I had it covered she gave me a bit of good news. She told me today that she asked the district manager if she could make me her assistant manager, he is fine with it but needs to check with the regional manager. So if my wife gets disability, and I get the asst. manager job I will be able to drop my other job completely. Which would be great because I am exausted!

Sandy just knocked trees down and knocked power out in our area so there was no flooding. However one officer did have a tree fall on him while he was sitting in his cruiser where another tree fell and wiped out a powerline. He has some fractured vertibrae and only time will tell what his recovery will be, but that was the only major issue I am aware of in my area.
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Kyle Weiss

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Location : Reno, NV
Registration date : 2011-09-18

PostSubject: Re: Apology and happinings   Fri Nov 16, 2012 2:31 pm

In my own b.s. that's arisen this year, hold on to the breakthroughs, the good things, and the glimmers of hope...they're golden. Smile

With ya, brother, be well, and we're here for ya.

Cool
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the rev

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Age : 51
Location : Oak View CA
Registration date : 2012-10-08

PostSubject: Re: Apology and happinings   Fri Nov 16, 2012 3:49 pm

hey, I am new here, but that is some heart breaking news. Glad there is some light at the end of the tunnel. In this ugly world there are glimmers of light, and beauty and hope, I pray you get some of those in the near future. Keep up the strength, it is a testament to your family.

blessings

rev
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mark
Admin
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Registration date : 2008-07-02

PostSubject: Re: Apology and happinings   Fri Nov 16, 2012 6:22 pm

Best of luck Cuervo, you've certainly been paying your dues,,,time for things to lighten up for you.

_________________
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Sometimes I wake up grumpy. Other times I let her sleep.
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Blackhorse
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Age : 70
Location : Oregon City
Registration date : 2010-10-23

PostSubject: Re: Apology and happinings   Fri Nov 16, 2012 8:47 pm

You don't owe any of us a thing Mr. C. Never did, never will. I'm sure we would all be willing to help in any way we could. I didn't know about your son, but thank God for the knowledge and skills of those that deal with those seemingly impossible issues. The same with your wife.

I've got a growing prayer list...and add to it gladly. So all of you will be included.

Stay healthy yourself...sounds like there's a very heavy load that you have to shoulder.

Our best.

_________________
Council Member, Trading Post & General Site Moderator.

Founding BoB Bombers Squadron Commander, Ret.
BoB Bombers Squadron Reserve CoCommander reactivated.
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Cuervo25_1

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Age : 43
Location : North New Jersey
Registration date : 2011-01-13

PostSubject: Re: Apology and happinings   Sat Nov 17, 2012 2:28 am

Thank you all for the kind words.

There has been a couple times I damn near walked out because I was so overwelmed and felt that My wife and son would get better care without me. The Last of those times I actually started packing and told my wife that even though I love her and our son so much and that it is killing me that I want to do this they would be better without me. That was my own major break through because I finally let go of everything I felt and let her know. After much crying (both of us) and alot of talking she finally got me to stay but with a new understanding of who I am and how much everything is effecting me.


Shortly after Sandy hit and work at the gas station increased as I mentioned before, but along with it came many tests of my tolerance for people and their arrogance and greed. For the most part everyone was calm but there was a few that kept pushing until I had to put them in their place. For example we had to save 1500 gallons of gas and another 1500 of diesel for emergency response, police and hospital workers. I had a guy roll up in a new corvette asking for gas and I told him that I cannot due to the amount we have. he proceded to try bribing me with $100 saying that everyone could use that kind of money. I agreed but added that my job is more important because it gives me more than that every week and the one time $100 won't pay my bills until I find a new job. He was persistant and said I filled his daughters car up and I asked if she was an EMT or some other sort of emergency worker. He said he didn't know , that all he knows is she is pretty. I replied what kind of father don't know what the hell his kid is doing, for all you know she could be a prostitude. Go the hell home find out what your kid is doing and what she likes because you aint getting gas from me, I don't care if you buy me a corvette!

Like I said though all in all it wasn't bad. Over the course of 4 days I made over $500 in tips which bought me a new pair of boots that I needed and the rest went into the bank for bills. Along with overtime on that check plus the 40 hours at my other job that week we managed to be a little ahead of the game.

BH, I felt horrible that I couldn't complete my last mission and went AWOL I felt that the least I could do is let you know why. My son has been through hell since the time he was conceived through now. I guess that is what hurts me the most, that no matter what I cannot make it all better, I can't just make all that bad stuff go away like it never happened at all. It also don't help either one of us that I am not home very much which hopefully soon will change.

I now understand why my dad was always working and I very rarely seen him until I was older, but back then I just wanted to have my Daddy around. Thats why I need to nip this in the bud ASAP before it is too late.


Things are looking up though and my wife and I have planned out some things. If she does get disability I am planning on keeping both jobs for awhile until I can get a few things done that I been wanting to do but didn't have the money to do. I also want a 4wd pickup and a boat, neither being new but just something that will serve my purpose. once all that falls in line and if I get the Asst. mngr job I am dumping my other one. I do not enjoy working on cars anymore, mainly because I am not fond of how the designers set everything up that makes a simple job damn near impossible. That is also the reason I do not want a new truck or boat.

I know this is long, but there is alot on my plate and I guess this is my therapy. I never been much on talking to someone face to face about my problems, even if you guys can't give me advice it is a great help that I know I can let it out and have people "listen"


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gravel

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Age : 43
Location : Oregon
Registration date : 2011-12-07

PostSubject: Re: Apology and happinings   Sat Nov 17, 2012 2:47 am

We can be good listeners. If sharing here helps, I'll read it and add it to my growing prayer list.

Glad you checked in.
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kaiser83

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Age : 34
Location : Wherever the smoke clears
Registration date : 2012-02-22

PostSubject: Re: Apology and happinings   Sat Nov 17, 2012 4:28 am

You and yours are most assuredly in my prayers brother. I am glad things are swinging your direction finally. We are all ears here brother and will gladly take time to help by talking to you.
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Jers

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Location : Ireland
Registration date : 2012-07-14

PostSubject: Re: Apology and happinings   Sat Nov 17, 2012 4:41 am

My thoughts and prayers are with you brother.

Best wishes.

Jers
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PeterD

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Age : 66
Location : Hixson, TN (Chattanooga Area)
Registration date : 2012-06-04

PostSubject: Apology & Happenings   Sat Nov 17, 2012 10:50 pm

...Thoughts and prayers are with you and your family...I know what you may be going through as I have adopted 3 special needs children, 12,16, and 17 who were all severely abused by their birth parents including sexual abuse...it is not an easy task to parent effectively and progress is slow...However, there is "light at the end...." Healing always takes time and strong resolve...I wish the very best for you... cheers
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Cuervo25_1

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Age : 43
Location : North New Jersey
Registration date : 2011-01-13

PostSubject: Re: Apology and happinings   Fri Nov 23, 2012 1:53 am

more news, the other day my wife called up childrens crisis intervention due to my sons worsening mood. They came and talked with both her and my son (I was at work...as friggen usual), and decided they are going to get him into every program that will help him. That includes anger management, therapy for physical issues that he has that aggrivates him and a few other things as well.


Things are looking up more and more,and since I am home most of the day tomorrow we will put the tree up together then veg out and watch whatever intrests him until I have to go to work. That will mean alot to him and I both.
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Cuervo25_1

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Age : 43
Location : North New Jersey
Registration date : 2011-01-13

PostSubject: Re: Apology and happinings   Sat Nov 24, 2012 1:34 am

WHOO HOO!!!!!!!!! My wife got her CPAP machine today! looking foward to my first peaceful nights sleep in 10 years Razz
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gravel

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Age : 43
Location : Oregon
Registration date : 2011-12-07

PostSubject: Re: Apology and happinings   Sat Nov 24, 2012 2:37 am

Cuervo25_1 wrote:
WHOO HOO!!!!!!!!! My wife got her CPAP machine today! looking foward to my first peaceful nights sleep in 10 years Razz

Hope you and your bride experience good and full sleep tonight.
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sand18f

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Age : 68
Location : Southern Appalachia
Registration date : 2011-01-17

PostSubject: Re: Apology and happinings   Thu Nov 29, 2012 9:38 pm

Hang in there brother.
Ya'll will love the CPAP. You and your family will be in my daily prayers.

Bill
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Cuervo25_1

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Age : 43
Location : North New Jersey
Registration date : 2011-01-13

PostSubject: Re: Apology and happinings   Thu Nov 29, 2012 10:23 pm

sand18f wrote:
Hang in there brother.
Ya'll will love the CPAP. You and your family will be in my daily prayers.

Bill

I already am lol, she took it off last night to talk to me then fell asleep, as did I . next thing I know she started snoring and I gently whacked her and said put on that mask please lol.
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Jers

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Location : Ireland
Registration date : 2012-07-14

PostSubject: Re: Apology and happinings   Fri Nov 30, 2012 3:54 am

Cuervo25_1 wrote:
sand18f wrote:
Hang in there brother.
Ya'll will love the CPAP. You and your family will be in my daily prayers.

Bill

I already am lol, she took it off last night to talk to me then fell asleep, as did I . next thing I know she started snoring and I gently whacked her and said put on that mask please lol.

lol!

Great news that the CPAP machine is working so well for you! cheers

Fraternally

Jers

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sand18f

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Age : 68
Location : Southern Appalachia
Registration date : 2011-01-17

PostSubject: Re: Apology and happinings   Fri Nov 30, 2012 10:41 pm

As you know, the CPAP will increase the oxygen in her blood stream. She will feel like a new person.

Mrs. sand18f kinda enjoys the Darth Vader routine. Sure she denies it but I can tell by the giggly screams while flutterwacking.

YMMV however. Cool

Bill
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