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 A quick update

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Briarbabe

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Age : 38
Location : PA
Registration date : 2013-07-30

PostSubject: A quick update   Fri Dec 13, 2013 3:49 pm

tl,dr; I'm still here, life has basically thrown up on me and I'm trying to dig my way out. I'm tired, cranky, and I miss you all.
I miss you all terribly and think about you quite a bit, my life has not been conducive to being online for recreation lately though. It seems the proverbial poop has hit the fan.

I have been running an in home daycare for the last year and just barely scraping by, it's not a good situation at all. Recently one of my daycare families (a close friend) told me that they would not be able to afford daycare much longer and will be pulling their kids from daycare in the beginning of February. I've been looking to add more daycare kids to my program for an entire year and it's been a constant headache. The area is flooded with childcare. I am barely scraping by as it is now and that's $720 of income a month gone come February. I am now racing to find a job after being out of the work force to raise a family for the past five years. I also need to find a more affordable place to live.

One of my two sweethearts (yes, I have two, everyone is aware of each other, I'm selfish, adulthood yo!) offered to let me rent their house from them and it would be cheaper and better for my family in so many ways, but I am hesitant because of the relationship attached to it. A lot of you may remember when I first joined up here, my boyfriend and I broke up shortly there after. Well, apparently I should have dumped him much sooner because for some reason we fell more in love and became better friends and are closer now than we ever were while actually dating and he and I have something incredibly special that's grown out of our break up and continues to grow. He's just a good man and we both have very specific things we want in a relationship and without going into great detail, what we have just works. He's incredibly protective of me and is always looking out for me and my kids, despite not wanting kids himself. So, while his offer is beyond generous and he'd be a much better landlord than my current one, I am still very hesitant to do this. I may have to take him up on his offer for a few months at the very least. For now though, his offer takes some of the stress off of me.

I feel like I'm racing against time here and time is winning. I know myself. I'm resourceful, hard, and a survivor. I will land on my feet even if I brake my ankles doing it!

I found out I have some health issues that require further testing to make sure it's not cancer and unfortunately I don't have the money out of pocket to pay for those tests and I have been calling charity after charity and applying for medical assistance and basically I fall into that #$^%$&@%$% doughnut hole where I make just enough money to be ineligible for government assistance and yet I'm still pretty much impoverished. Apparently to get help from the government you have to quit trying/working altogether and just become a welfare queen and well, pardon my french but fuck that noise, I will never give up working for this family. I'll figure this out too damn it.

My kindergartner has been struggling since day one in kindergarten with behavior issues and I've known I was staring at an ADHD diagnosis since this kids 3rd birthday. I am getting no where with the school and it's all "We need your support as a parent!", and they have it, but they have no plan and seem to expect me to come up with one. Well, I can't sit next to him in class all day and I have no idea how that class room operates, so guess what, Mrs. Kindergarten Teacher, you need to come up with one and yes, I will support it. We had his follow up doctor's appt. this morning and we are going to try the meds. I have been incredibly hesitant to start down this path, but I have been assured by many parents as well as folks who formerly took meds, that he's going to be okay and this is most likely going to be a very, very good thing. The sweetheart who has offered to rent me his home is used to take ADD meds and he is the most responsible, mellow, laid back man I've ever met in my life. Apart from him having a tick (a rather interesting and fascinating one to boot!) he has no lasting side effects. He did warn me my picky eater is about to get a whole lot pickier. ::sigh::

My wee littlest guy is going in to have his speech tested as it seems he's behind and struggling. I'm not worried, he's born from a long line of kids who talk too damn much. He'll figure it out. Smile

I'm helping the teenager get into college and signed up for financial aid as much as I can and I thank my lucky stars that she's an incredibly responsible and brilliant young woman as she's taken a lot of this upon herself to do and wow, just wow. I'm so proud of her. (Holy run on sentence Batman!)

And then there's mom. She's still working a full time job and her chemo symptoms have cleared up almost completely. She is however experiencing debilitating pain in her stomach from time to time and wasn't telling her doctors about it. Despite everyone in the family telling her to go to the doctors she wouldn't listen until her acupuncturist told her to go, now! Well that finally lit a fire under her butt. (Can you hear my eyes roll?) At first they thought it was her gal bladder, but no it's actually HER LIVER! You know? Where she has CANCER? Her liver enzymes are up and it's inflamed and apparently some of the lesions and tiny tumors are bursting and causing the pain. She keeps insisting that her scans and blood work are ok and that not much has changed. Well that's not bad, but it's not good either. I flat out asked if I could call her oncologist and her "other" doctors to get an update on her and she told me no. I'm really beginning to wonder if she isn't leaving details out. She's lost weight and she feels good though so that's what's important. Even if it just means she feels good until the cancer really gets a hold of her. Whatever, it's her choice and she's happy with it and apparently feels good even though the cancer is still there and is unresponsive to the "alternative therapies" she's trying. I love her. She's my mom. I'm going to support her.

We are getting ready to head up to spend the week of Christmas through New Year's day with my mom and dad and it's going to be insane because my aunt is coming up with her daughter and her daughter's husband and they decided to bring her daughter's in laws up as well. Seriously? I just...what the...why are people so dumb? So I have no idea who these people are, but they're spending Christmas with us and I'm just having a hard time with it because lets face it I have no idea how many more Christmas's I have with my mom or what shape she's going to be in for them and I'm having a hard time typing this without dropping the f-bomb. Anyway! The other sweetheart (the one who let me shoot his handguns) has expressed an interest in meeting my parents, especially with mom having cancer so he's coming up to spend New Year's eve with us and the house will be cleared out by then and it should be nice.

So yeah, been a little busy lately. I have a wonderful "family" down here in PA that I hand picked myself and two wonderful men in my life who are probably better to me than they deserve (Razz). This is tough, but I've got good people in my life. To those of you who have popped on to send me a PM checking in on me, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you! I can not tell you all just how much this community means to me and the love and support you give. The moments that I do get to be on here abate some of the stress and I just means a great deal to me. Thank you BoB'ers. I'm still here, I'm still fighting the universe tooth and nail, and the universe is still winning, but damn it, I ain't done fighting, not by a long shot!

(Also, if you actually read all of this you deserve a medal, some fine aged tobacco, and a bottle of good single malt scotch.)
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Briarbabe

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Age : 38
Location : PA
Registration date : 2013-07-30

PostSubject: Re: A quick update   Fri Dec 13, 2013 3:52 pm

lol! lol! lol! lol!  I just looked at the title of my post and then the length of it. Sweet baby gherkins I need a break!
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the rev

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Age : 51
Location : Oak View CA
Registration date : 2012-10-08

PostSubject: Re: A quick update   Fri Dec 13, 2013 4:49 pm

wow, fan meet shit

you have my well wishes, good thoughts, positive vibes and prayers.

rev
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Ocelot55

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Location : Columbus, OH
Registration date : 2012-03-28

PostSubject: Re: A quick update   Fri Dec 13, 2013 5:00 pm

Life, huh? Beats the alternative I guess.

Hang in there BB. I'll say a prayer for you and your family.
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Hawker

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Age : 51
Location : Alberta
Registration date : 2012-05-15

PostSubject: Re: A quick update   Fri Dec 13, 2013 5:52 pm

I was begining to wonder where you were and if you were allright BB thinking "it looks like we've lost another good member". Crying or Very sad 

Sorry to hear of all the rough times your going thru but if anyone can handle it I get the feeling from what I've grown to know thru the BoB you'll come out on top even tougher than before.

I have an experience with a young child who is ADHD and to be honest I tried to avoid him as much as possible when he was young as I swear he had horns growing out of his head and a tail out his ass.

When they final dianosed him with ADHD and after all other support measures put him on meds. You wouldn't believe the difference. Actually one of my favorite kids to be around and spend quality time with now. There's still lots of issues to deal with but an understanding of what they are going thru and patients helps. (even when your at your wits end).

Don't sweat the long post where allways here for your support. Better a long venting post here on the BoB now than a blown up postal worker/situation down the road. lol! 

Hang in there Babe. cheers
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Briar Spirit

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Age : 49
Location : England UK
Registration date : 2012-08-30

PostSubject: Re: A quick update   Fri Dec 13, 2013 5:56 pm

Crikey BB, you really have been going through the wringer and then some mate, I wish so much I could do something to help ease you through all these horribly difficult things. Just wanted you to know I read your message here from start to finish and I hear ya Buddy, best I can do is send you my best wishes and to hope things get a whole lot better for you soon.
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BigCasino

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Age : 49
Location : North of Pittsburgh pa
Registration date : 2012-11-27

PostSubject: Re: A quick update   Fri Dec 13, 2013 6:11 pm

Keep your chin up, it's often a tough road, but if you can stay on course and go the distance there is always something sweeter at the end of it

and for the record ADD meds ( ADDERALL) does suppress appetite, my youngest took that, it worked perfectly for him with no ill effects except a little weight loss. it helped him all through school and then tech school
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WarlockBob

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Age : 25
Location : Beaverton, OR
Registration date : 2012-09-30

PostSubject: Re: A quick update   Fri Dec 13, 2013 6:53 pm

I'll send good thoughts and such your way!!

I grew up in a divorced household, working and running a business to help my mom make ends meet. It's not easy at all, but I have no doubt that you can make it though this!

You'll definitely have the support of all of us here, I'm sure of that!  Smile 
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Briarbabe

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Age : 38
Location : PA
Registration date : 2013-07-30

PostSubject: Re: A quick update   Fri Dec 13, 2013 7:26 pm

Thanks for the thought, prayers, and such guys. It really does mean a lot to me.

Yep, things are tough over here, but I'll land on my feet. I always do. And as crazy as all of this is, I'm happy. It's my crazy, frustrating life and I love it. I love my kids, I love my family, I love my friends, I love my guys. I was a hell of a lot more comfortable a year and a half ago, but I was completely miserable. I made some tough decisions and left my safety nets behind and yeah it's been hard, but I'm happier now than I've ever been. I got good and comfortable with who I really am and stopped trying to be something I wasn't. And you know what? The people in my life that mattered are still here with me and the ones who didn't fell along the wayside.
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Fishfuzz

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Age : 42
Location : Oregon
Registration date : 2012-05-24

PostSubject: Re: A quick update   Fri Dec 13, 2013 7:38 pm

Ugh! Hope this gets better for you soon. We'll all be keeping you in our prayers.

Check your mailbox. Maybe that'll cheer you up. ;D
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Briarbabe

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Age : 38
Location : PA
Registration date : 2013-07-30

PostSubject: Re: A quick update   Fri Dec 13, 2013 7:47 pm

Fishfuzz wrote:
Ugh! Hope this gets better for you soon. We'll all be keeping you in our prayers.

Check your mailbox. Maybe that'll cheer you up. ;D

Are you my secret Santa? I got my package but don't know who to thank. My secret Santa didn't leave their name.
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i.keenum

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Age : 27
Location : coast of mississippi
Registration date : 2011-06-12

PostSubject: Re: A quick update   Fri Dec 13, 2013 7:59 pm

Sorry for the hassels BB. You pulling through way stronger than most people would. Here is another bowl to continuing perseverance. Good luck as always. pirat 
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Fr_Tom

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Location : Diocese of Northern Indiana
Registration date : 2013-05-29

PostSubject: Re: A quick update   Fri Dec 13, 2013 8:15 pm

You need a break for sure. It is a tough place to be, and I am really sorry for you. It is good to hear from you, even if the times are tough and the news is not cheery.

We are all keeping you in prayers/thoughts depending on religious persuasion.

Sometimes you don't have much choice but to roll with the punches.
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Brewdude

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Age : 64
Location : Near the Emerald city
Registration date : 2011-05-04

PostSubject: Re: A quick update   Fri Dec 13, 2013 9:05 pm

Been wondering about you BB and your absence as of late.

Sometimes it just helps to vent, and right here is as good a place as any. I'm reasonably certain there's many folks right here that have had multiple slap downs that can relate to your situation.

Despite all the bad issues you're facing right now, you seem to display a positive attitude. That's number one in my book. Keep that up.



Cheers,

RR
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Hiram-2011

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Age : 39
Location : Illinois
Registration date : 2012-03-23

PostSubject: Re: A quick update   Fri Dec 13, 2013 11:48 pm

My thoughts & prayers are sent your way Smile
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KevinM



Age : 74
Location : Connecticut
Registration date : 2012-02-26

PostSubject: Re: A quick update   Sat Dec 14, 2013 12:48 am

Ooof. That's all I can think of. Ooof.

I hope you catch a break soon with at least a couple of your problems.

Your story makes me think of The Book of Job, which at least ended well.

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Fishfuzz

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Age : 42
Location : Oregon
Registration date : 2012-05-24

PostSubject: Re: A quick update   Sun Dec 15, 2013 11:52 am

Briarbabe wrote:
Fishfuzz wrote:
Ugh! Hope this gets better for you soon. We'll all be keeping you in our prayers.

Check your mailbox. Maybe that'll cheer you up. ;D

Are you my secret Santa? I got my package but don't know who to thank. My secret Santa didn't leave their name.

Spoilers!
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huffelpuff

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Age : 47
Location : Laramie, WY
Registration date : 2011-12-10

PostSubject: Re: A quick update   Sun Dec 15, 2013 8:26 pm

Really hope things settle down there for you BB. As always we're here to lend an ear or a shoulder if needed. Hope your little one is doing better too.

Best
Jim
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Bub

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Registration date : 2007-12-15

PostSubject: Re: A quick update   Sun Dec 15, 2013 10:12 pm

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Briarbabe

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Age : 38
Location : PA
Registration date : 2013-07-30

PostSubject: Re: A quick update   Mon Dec 16, 2013 10:43 pm

Guys! Guys! Guys! Guess what? I have a job interview with a local bank on Friday! I'm really excited. I used to be a head teller back in the day (eight years ago) and I'd love to get back into it. I did my application online Thursday and they called me this afternoon.
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DrumsAndBeer

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Age : 45
Location : Northern, CA
Registration date : 2012-04-04

PostSubject: Re: A quick update   Mon Dec 16, 2013 11:09 pm

Briarbabe wrote:
Guys! Guys! Guys! Guess what? I have a job interview with a local bank on Friday! I'm really excited. I used to be a head teller back in the day (eight years ago) and I'd love to get back into it. I did my application online Thursday and they called me this afternoon.

 cheers rendeer 
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Brewdude

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Age : 64
Location : Near the Emerald city
Registration date : 2011-05-04

PostSubject: Re: A quick update   Mon Dec 16, 2013 11:15 pm

Briarbabe wrote:
Guys! Guys! Guys! Guess what? I have a job interview with a local bank on Friday! I'm really excited. I used to be a head teller back in the day (eight years ago) and I'd love to get back into it. I did my application online Thursday and they called me this afternoon.

Great news BB!





Cheers,

RR
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Hawker

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Age : 51
Location : Alberta
Registration date : 2012-05-15

PostSubject: Re: A quick update   Tue Dec 17, 2013 12:19 am

That's awesome BB. Congrats.
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i.keenum

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Age : 27
Location : coast of mississippi
Registration date : 2011-06-12

PostSubject: Re: A quick update   Tue Dec 17, 2013 12:51 am

Great news ! Here is my hopes to you getting that job. Very Happy 
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PozzSka

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Age : 34
Location : Valley City, OH
Registration date : 2013-07-02

PostSubject: Re: A quick update   Tue Dec 17, 2013 2:16 pm

I was working and had a busy weekend, so I missed this...

that's life, and as the cat man said, it's beats the alternative...

Glad to hear about a potential job opportunity.

I won't say a prayer, but I hope things work out for you in the way you want most.

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