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 I got my butt kicked

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Ozark Wizard

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Age : 53
Location : Mark Twain National Forest, MO
Registration date : 2014-10-11

PostSubject: I got my butt kicked   Wed May 24, 2017 8:11 pm

Yuppers. Three females. First one kicked me in the chest and knocked me to the ground, windless, and apparently one short rib broken. The second and third, when I had my arms around their necks, bucked and ran around the forest until they sheared me off on trees. No worries though, my right arm gets dislocated sometimes when I slam it into walnut trees at 30 mph. That I was able to get back in place before I went to the doctor's. At least I got the girls into the barn for shearing before the rain came.... Nice to lay in the fecal ridden ground outside the barn door in the rain, sun shining on me, while I tried to breathe. The kind of schnitzel that makes you feel alive, y'know?

Frackin' llamas. They know what's comin'. Guess I might have had it comin' too....

The sheep were easy. Grab 'em and toss 'em in their section. Harder to do with the busted rib, but way lighter.... Not much under their fibre...

Currently back home from the hospital, chest wrapped, smoking some Grandpa's Sweater in a cob, chicken and rice for supper cooking, and a nice pull in a glass of apple moonshine to nurse....

Oh, oh, what really bites is that I had a Falcon Dublin in my flannel pocket before all of this, not expecting the drama. It's somewhere out there, in the woods. Not a great set up, but RATS! There goes the rotation....

I swear I will enjoy ever bite of those llama steaks in the months ahead.

every single one.
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Brewdude

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Age : 64
Location : Near the Emerald city
Registration date : 2011-05-04

PostSubject: Re: I got my butt kicked   Wed May 24, 2017 8:27 pm

Shocked No

Helluva way to spend a Wed, Ozzie. Hope you get the last word on that conversation! monkey



Cheers?

RR
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Ozark Wizard

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Age : 53
Location : Mark Twain National Forest, MO
Registration date : 2014-10-11

PostSubject: Re: I got my butt kicked   Wed May 24, 2017 9:13 pm

ah recun.........
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huffelpuff

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Age : 47
Location : Laramie, WY
Registration date : 2011-12-10

PostSubject: Re: I got my butt kicked   Wed May 24, 2017 11:56 pm

Keep your eyes open you might get lucky and spot the pipe. Shame you got busted up for some stinking fur. I know when I was younger the sheep were always grateful to get rid of all that hair. You'd think llamas would be that smart but I guess not. Take care of yourself and enjoy those steaks when the time comes.

Jim
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MisterE
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Location : Mexico City
Registration date : 2009-08-24

PostSubject: Re: I got my butt kicked   Thu May 25, 2017 12:29 am

For a second there I was thinking three women had attacked you! You might need to get a full body armor suit for your next shearing.


_________________
Many of the greatest pleasures in life are illegal, immoral, or smelly.

-Yak
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AdamCordray

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Age : 31
Location : Northwest Indiana
Registration date : 2016-08-08

PostSubject: Re: I got my butt kicked   Thu May 25, 2017 7:18 am

Haha sounds like an adventure! I really wish I could get out of this suburban monotony... I still need to convince SWMBO that living more than 5 minutes from the nearest grocery store really isn't such a bad thing. Progress, but slow progress, in that arena. I hope you find the pipe, would be a shame to lose an old friend like that. How does llama taste anyway?

AC
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Ozark Wizard

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Age : 53
Location : Mark Twain National Forest, MO
Registration date : 2014-10-11

PostSubject: Re: I got my butt kicked   Thu May 25, 2017 8:20 am

AdamCordray wrote:
Haha sounds like an adventure! I really wish I could get out of this suburban monotony... I still need to convince SWMBO that living more than 5 minutes from the nearest grocery store really isn't such a bad thing. Progress, but slow progress, in that arena. I hope you find the pipe, would be a shame to lose an old friend like that. How does llama taste anyway?

AC

Like Angus beef. Sharpening knives as we speak...
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Stick

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Age : 47
Location : 'Blighty'
Registration date : 2014-02-19

PostSubject: Re: I got my butt kicked   Thu May 25, 2017 11:35 am

Ok Wiz, you lost me at the shearing. The good looking rooster that you are, for a few magical moments I thought you'd been dragged into the woods by some rather 'keen' young ladies.

Bloody lamas? !?!!!!

Seriously though, that didn't sound too good. How are you shaping up now?

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Ozark Wizard

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Age : 53
Location : Mark Twain National Forest, MO
Registration date : 2014-10-11

PostSubject: Re: I got my butt kicked   Thu May 25, 2017 2:07 pm

I won the 'hair match'.......

Here are the losers Twisted Evil











Some folks on horseback came by and stopped to watch. One said I was 'one tough ol' coot'.....

hmph. Time for a nice bowl of GH Rum Flake and a second cup of coffee.
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Stick

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Age : 47
Location : 'Blighty'
Registration date : 2014-02-19

PostSubject: Re: I got my butt kicked   Thu May 25, 2017 3:58 pm

You did a good job there Wiz and it looks like a nice patch you live on. I'm not sure why but in my mind I had your land being a bit more open with less trees. What other wildlife do you get Wiz?
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Bonanzadriver

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Registration date : 2017-04-12

PostSubject: Re: I got my butt kicked   Thu May 25, 2017 4:23 pm

Wiz,

I'd be willin to bet that one of yer buddies has a metal detector and that he could prolly help a brutha out in findin his Falcon Smoker!

Good luck Wink
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Ozark Wizard

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Age : 53
Location : Mark Twain National Forest, MO
Registration date : 2014-10-11

PostSubject: Re: I got my butt kicked   Thu May 25, 2017 4:55 pm

Thanks Stick, I try to shear them to the quick on the first pass, as it makes for longer fibre, and a shorter job of it. I have 18 acres(a bit over 7 hectares I believe), mostly wooded with a couple of meadows. The llamas did a lot of clearing of low brush on a third of the property, and that is where I like to have my petting zoo. Plenty of shade under the canopy.
Wildlife, other than a plethora of birds, consists of Opossum, wild hare, Armadillo, a small variety of turtles, Raccoon, squirrel, deer, occasionally elk when they migrate through or calve here, wild pig(Razorback), coyote, and snakes of various kinds. My pond dries up too often to support fish unfortunately, though the creek seems to come up out of the ground, and tends to keep flowing even in the dry months. I have heard neighbors claim that there are black bear, wolves and big cats, but I have yet to come across any of those in my time here...

Some wild turkey like to nest along the creek when breeding season is on. I take one a year for celebratory suppers and the feathers. The deer and other creatures I only shoot with my cameras.

Bonanzadriver, there is so much metal in the ground out here the detector would never shut up. Alas, next month I will attend to a new set up. Just a bummer to get the right bowl broken in for a particular blend and be dumb enough to pocket it while breaking llamas in the forest.. Just a silly move on my part.... At least it was just the standard chrome straight stem and a rusticated Dublin. I didn't lose the Shillelagh/Apple Hunter, I left that in the barn on my gloves...
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Stick

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Age : 47
Location : 'Blighty'
Registration date : 2014-02-19

PostSubject: Re: I got my butt kicked   Thu May 25, 2017 5:21 pm

Gosh Wiz, that sounds like a beautiful corner of our planet and one I'd love to explore. Recon it would really prickle my senses.

On shearing, I used to live on a farm in Snowdonia, Wales, where sheep farming is one of the country's biggest incomes. I used to help during lambing season and used to watch the old hands shear. They'd be impressed by your cut.

That reminds me, I must clipper my own hair this weekend.
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Ozark Wizard

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Age : 53
Location : Mark Twain National Forest, MO
Registration date : 2014-10-11

PostSubject: Re: I got my butt kicked   Thu May 25, 2017 7:35 pm

Well, I haven't had a cut that short since I hung up my uniform.... Though sometimes it would be cooler in summer with shorter hair. lol!
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Brewdude

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Age : 64
Location : Near the Emerald city
Registration date : 2011-05-04

PostSubject: Re: I got my butt kicked   Thu May 25, 2017 7:36 pm

So where does all the sheared wool go Ozzie? Do you weave it into yarn yourself or sell it to someone for further processing? It'd be great to get a sweater or even a hat made from your Llama wool.

Glad to know you're not incapacitated due to the rodeo. Pity about the pipe though.



Cheers,

RR
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Ozark Wizard

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Age : 53
Location : Mark Twain National Forest, MO
Registration date : 2014-10-11

PostSubject: Re: I got my butt kicked   Thu May 25, 2017 7:59 pm

Brewdude wrote:
So where does all the sheared wool go Ozzie? Do you weave it into yarn yourself or sell it to someone for further processing? It'd be great to get a sweater or even a hat made from your Llama wool.

Glad to know you're not incapacitated due to the rodeo. Pity about the pipe though.



Cheers,

RR

I spin it or trade it. Yah, I make yarn.... I don't knit though. I crochet a bit, and felt, but not knit, yet....

I use a carder and combs to process the fibre into roving, which in turn gets spun into single strand, then I ply two of those together to make yarn. The sheep's white wool I can colour, the balance of what the animals provide I leave au-natural'...
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Ozark Wizard

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Age : 53
Location : Mark Twain National Forest, MO
Registration date : 2014-10-11

PostSubject: Re: I got my butt kicked   Fri May 26, 2017 11:29 am

Went out to feed the zoo breakfast and found the Falcon. A bit trampled, but still smoking!

Cleaned it up and loaded with some Pebble Castle. Sweet!

cheers
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Richard Burley

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Location : North Coast NY
Registration date : 2011-04-09

PostSubject: Re: I got my butt kicked   Fri May 26, 2017 11:51 am

Ozark Wizard wrote:
Went out to feed the zoo breakfast and found the Falcon. A bit trampled, but still smoking!...

New ad slogan: "FALCON--the pipe as tough as its owners!"

Man, I hate broken or cracked ribs. (Now there's a profound statement!) Can you breathe OK?
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Ozark Wizard

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Age : 53
Location : Mark Twain National Forest, MO
Registration date : 2014-10-11

PostSubject: Re: I got my butt kicked   Fri May 26, 2017 11:59 am

I was told by the Dr. To avoid strenuous work and deep breathing for a while. (smirk) So I just did the shearing the following day. Today, well, today is a very different day. I'm dreaming of a hovercraft recliner and a crew of Minions.
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Richard Burley

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Location : North Coast NY
Registration date : 2011-04-09

PostSubject: Re: I got my butt kicked   Fri May 26, 2017 12:07 pm

Don't sneeze. Twisted Evil
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Stick

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Age : 47
Location : 'Blighty'
Registration date : 2014-02-19

PostSubject: Re: I got my butt kicked   Fri May 26, 2017 4:47 pm

Ozark Wizard wrote:
I was told by the Dr. To avoid strenuous work and deep breathing for a while. (smirk) So I just did the shearing the following day.

Pure gold. lol!
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arkansaspiper

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Age : 26
Location : some where in a galaxy far far away
Registration date : 2016-01-22

PostSubject: Re: I got my butt kicked   Fri May 26, 2017 10:04 pm

Sounds like our place.
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bosun1

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Location : fly over country
Registration date : 2012-10-23

PostSubject: Re: I got my butt kicked   Sat May 27, 2017 2:38 pm

Nice pictures, but I don't see a pic of your sheep dog.
Hint????
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