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| | When the wife disapproves... | |
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| Author | Message |
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bentbulldog

Number of posts: 291 Age: 29 Location: Briarwood, NY (not joking) Tobacco: Mostly the good Aromatics, Virginia's, and Heavy Latakia Blends
Middle Earth Blend (RIP)
Boswell's Christmas Cookie, Berry Cobbler, Northwoods
S&G FVF & Best Brown, Esoterica Stonehaven & Penzance
Frog Morton, Red Rapparee,
G&H Rumflake, Bosun Cut Plug, Louisiana Flake, Best Brown #2, Brown Flake Unscented. Pipe: Kili, Fili, Oin, Gloin, Dwalin, Balin, Bifur, Bofur, Bombur, Dori, Nori, Ori, Thorin, Bilbo, Gandalf, Frodo, Sam, Merry, Pippin, Aragorn, Legolas, Gimli, Boromir and special Guest
Sméagol/Gollum Registration date: 2009-06-21
 | Subject: When the wife disapproves... Mon Jul 20, 2009 11:52 am | |
| I enjoy pipe smoking. I've smoked cigs and cigars but nothing has compared to this. I However do not live alone. No children yet but My wife has openly disclosed her dislike and disapproval of my smoking  Ive attempted to alleiviate it in any way I can think of from a dual exhaust fan and smoking near the window to smoking candles and febreeze. Even the best of aromatics don't work. While she has told me she's getting used to it, she would still prefer I not smoke ( partially bc of the smell and part bc of the health concerns) I've tried smoking outside but living in an appartment makes it difficult and the winds are always impeding my smokes. What can I do to make it easier on her? |
|  | | Centurian 803 Long Arm O' The Law

Number of posts: 1568 Age: 62 Location: Oak Ridge, TN Tobacco: Gatlin Burley, Exhausted Rooster, EMP etc, etc.... Pipe: GBD Canadian-Sasquatch Canadian Registration date: 2008-09-10
 | Subject: Re: When the wife disapproves... Mon Jul 20, 2009 12:18 pm | |
| Just look her square in the eye and say, "I'm the king of my castle and this is my castle. I'll smoke if I want!!! ... Is it ok, Dear?" Sorry friend, I have no advice along those lines. |
|  | | Guest Guest
 | Subject: Re: When the wife disapproves... Mon Jul 20, 2009 12:31 pm | |
| Tough one bro. I'm relegated to smoking outdoors or in my workshop/man cave. Is there a smoking club/parlor nearby? It may be time to look for a house with a garage or workshop. |
|  | | Ol'Dawg

Number of posts: 2097 Age: 67 Location: Northeast Georgia Registration date: 2008-01-03
 | Subject: Re: When the wife disapproves... Mon Jul 20, 2009 1:01 pm | |
| One of the main problems in a marriage is that women want the man/husband to change and men want the woman/wife to stay the same. Sorta of control thing. If you were smoking when you got married and it wasn't a problem for her to say "I do" take him for better or worse, your smoking shouldn't be a problem now. Early in our 38+ years of marriage, me wife wanted me to stop smoking. I put her off for a while by telling her I smoked when we got married and wondered why it had become a problem. A few weeks later and knowing she has a weak stomach and detested chewing tobacco, I told her I had quit smoking and started chewing tobacco. After a few days she decided that my smoking was not so bad after all and much better than the chewing. Jim...still smoking a pipe but not chewing  |
|  | | Tennessee Dave

Number of posts: 1027 Age: 62 Location: Dayton, Tennessee Tobacco: GLP Haddo's Delight, Maltese Falcon, Blackpoint, Charing Cross, Barbary Coast
Pipe: Rad Davis Bent Brandy and Castello 55 shape
Brian Ruthenberg Stubby Apple
Randy Wiley bent Galleon
Bruce Weaver Brandy Nosewarmer
Registration date: 2008-02-12
 | Subject: Re: When the wife disapproves... Mon Jul 20, 2009 1:07 pm | |
| Man that is a tough situation for sure. I don't smoke in the main part of the house but in the basement during the winter and out on the porch the rest of the time. I wish you well in finding a solution because there is one law of nature that is true beyond question:
Happy Wife = Happy Life |
|  | | Rad Davis

Number of posts: 396 Age: 63 Location: Foley, Alabama, USA Registration date: 2007-12-15
 | Subject: Re: When the wife disapproves... Mon Jul 20, 2009 2:04 pm | |
| | Tennessee Dave wrote: | Man that is a tough situation for sure. I don't smoke in the main part of the house but in the basement during the winter and out on the porch the rest of the time. I wish you well in finding a solution because there is one law of nature that is true beyond question:
Happy Wife = Happy Life |
Or, as they say in Lower Alabama, "If Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy!" |
|  | | Troll

Number of posts: 109 Age: 77 Location: PA Tobacco: 1Q Pipe: any Stanwell Registration date: 2009-02-10
 | Subject: Re: When the wife disapproves... Mon Jul 20, 2009 2:23 pm | |
| LOOK just let her know who the BOSS is:
UM quit smoking |
|  | | pipetongue1 Tobacco Hoarder At Large

Number of posts: 2178 Age: 68 Location: Abington, Mass. Tobacco: Bosun Cut Plug Pipe: Tim Hynick POY Registration date: 2007-12-14
 | Subject: Re: When the wife disapproves... Mon Jul 20, 2009 2:43 pm | |
| Get a new wife!! Pacem en Puffing!  |
|  | | Mikem The Coordinator

Number of posts: 1494 Age: 57 Location: Glendale, Arizona Tobacco: Pembroke Pipe: Mike Brissett Bulldog Registration date: 2007-12-14
 | Subject: Re: When the wife disapproves... Mon Jul 20, 2009 3:11 pm | |
| You can always tell her the bright side. Your not out in the bars all night drinking and carrying on with other women. At least I'm at home with you enjoying a nice pipe and your company.
If that doesn't work I'm with pipetongue1, time to get a new wife. I guess I'm too old to have my wife tell me what I can eat, drink or smoke. I don't cheat on my wife, drink (except the occasional cocktail about once a week), keep a roof over her head and food in her belly. I think I deserve to have a pipe or cigar when I want. Why is it a lot of modern women do their darnedest to have us be milk toast wimps to meet what they want. No wonder so many marriages fail. I'm done with my soapbox now. |
|  | | Winslow

Number of posts: 2024 Age: 67 Location: Midlothian,Va. Tobacco: Gawith&Hoggarth's,Virginias of excellence Pipe: Meerschaums Registration date: 2008-04-11
 | Subject: Re: When the wife disapproves... Mon Jul 20, 2009 3:19 pm | |
| If you have the exhaust fan and smoke near the window it should be O.K. Maybe move the computer near the window with the fan.They are confused about the health risks equating them with inhaling cigarettes,make it clear that pipe smoking is a different thing alltogether and not so injurious to your health.She may come around to acceptance.Don't leave the ashtray full and dispose of used cleaners promptly so she can't complain about the smell. Winslow  |
|  | | Guest Guest
 | Subject: Re: When the wife disapproves... Mon Jul 20, 2009 4:28 pm | |
| My ex wife used to like my pipes, but she didn't want me smoking cigars in the house... Long story short, I'm divorced. Now I declare myself a smoker immdediately upon meeting new people. In my area, it's a well-known fact that I am a smoker.
Basically, some good insight here; I too meet people that think they can get me to quit smoking (or drinking). Guess the best I can figure would be to find a smoking pub or coffee house within walking distance. Find a park where you can sit and smoke.
How long will you be in that apartment? Remember to find a house where you can have a smoking room, garage, or even a porch/balcony where you can smoke.
Quite frankly, I smoked outside during the marriage on my porch or car port, but it just got to hot here. Oh I got it!
Find another smoker in the building and become smoking buddies! Then you can go over to his/her place with some beer or tea and smoke! |
|  | | clueless
Number of posts: 201 Location: Cincinnati, Ohio Tobacco: English Blends, Night Train, Strauss Private Stock, IRC Flake, Gawith Commonwealth, always looking for new tastes. Have yet to find an aro I like. Pipe: a couple of Savonellis, , surprising Irsa, Nording, cobs, some good smoking no names and a new Pete. Registration date: 2009-04-01
 | Subject: Wife Mon Jul 20, 2009 4:46 pm | |
| I'm lucky. We have a big beautiful house that could be a showplace. fortunately we have always said, and lived, that it is not a showplace, it's where we live. Living includes smoking my pipes and my wife tolerates it and I, in turn, tolerate her stuff. You know what I mean. I tolerate that she puts up with that d#$%b a#$ pipe smoking husband of hers.
Seriously, though, I lucked out, but if i were in your situation I would probably be tempted to restrict myself to some nice aro blends in the house and get her a really nice meer or classy church warden. |
|  | | bentbulldog

Number of posts: 291 Age: 29 Location: Briarwood, NY (not joking) Tobacco: Mostly the good Aromatics, Virginia's, and Heavy Latakia Blends
Middle Earth Blend (RIP)
Boswell's Christmas Cookie, Berry Cobbler, Northwoods
S&G FVF & Best Brown, Esoterica Stonehaven & Penzance
Frog Morton, Red Rapparee,
G&H Rumflake, Bosun Cut Plug, Louisiana Flake, Best Brown #2, Brown Flake Unscented. Pipe: Kili, Fili, Oin, Gloin, Dwalin, Balin, Bifur, Bofur, Bombur, Dori, Nori, Ori, Thorin, Bilbo, Gandalf, Frodo, Sam, Merry, Pippin, Aragorn, Legolas, Gimli, Boromir and special Guest
Sméagol/Gollum Registration date: 2009-06-21
 | Subject: Re: When the wife disapproves... Mon Jul 20, 2009 5:32 pm | |
| He bad news is that anything I smoke smells bad to her, and I've tried Many aros. The good news is that since it's all the same, I can smoke my English/ Balkans and she doesn't know.  I'll be sure to have a place to smoke in when I finally buy a house. I saw a special lamp at the shop, Berger lamp. Does that help in any way? |
|  | | jlong

Number of posts: 673 Age: 55 Location: Northeast Wisconsin Tobacco: Old ironsides, Bailey's Balkan Blend, C&D Star of the East Pipe: Nording bent apple Registration date: 2009-07-07
 | Subject: Re: When the wife disapproves... Mon Jul 20, 2009 5:56 pm | |
| Women love the aroma of Mixture 79. |
|  | | Herzl

Number of posts: 56 Age: 61 Location: Oklahoma Tobacco: 1792 Pipe: Peterson's Army Registration date: 2009-05-17
 | Subject: Re: When the wife disapproves... Mon Jul 20, 2009 6:18 pm | |
| I'm twice divorced, so take what I'm about to say with that pound of salt. I feel for you, and wish you the best, no matter what.
The main reason I write is to be clear, within myself. I'm not a Catholic by any stretch of anyone's imagination, but I think it proper to give attribution where it's properly due. In an effort to decrease divorce, and to improve the quality of marriages, they have 'Marriage Encounters' and 'Engagement Encounters.'
The bottom line is that becoming disillusioned with your partner is normal, and that through dialogue you get back to a decision to love. Both partners agree to sit down and write their thoughts and feelings about their 'issues,' one issue each at a time, with each other. Then you make a sort of meeting, with no outside interruptions allowed, to exchange what you have written and to talk about it at least to understanding what the other person is thinking and feeling. You don't have to come to a conclusion, but you do have to agree to talk openly, started by being willing to write it down before you start talking. Hopefully, standing in a commitment to getting to the decision to love.
Whether you quit smoking or not, the true test is whether the two of you are willing to effectively dialogue, a corny term no question, but the core of any lasting relationship nevertheless. |
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